You certainly have a legal right to a divorce. States like Missouri and Illinois will grant a divorce when only one of the two spouses wants one. No fault. Fault matters in other areas of a divorce, but one spouse can obtain a divorce from the other spouse for any reason, no reason or even a bad reason. That isn't the question, though. You asked, “Should I get a divorce?”
That depends on your own answers to a number of questions.
First things first. Are you safe? Has there been any incidence of violence, abuse, neglect...? Are your children safe? When you say “we argue” are you ever threatened or restrained by your spouse? Are the children ever present? Do you have a safe way to escape the house with your children if things get out-of-hand? Do you know where you would drive?... who you would call? Has your spouse been faithful? Has your spouse jeopardized your health because of unfaithfulness? Are you still living together? What has been happening since you separated.
Is there anything else you can do to save the marriage? Do you have children? Why do you think divorce is the answer? I have never met anyone who took the time to make every effort to save their marriage who have a guilty conscience about the divorce.
Did you know that divorce is more emotional than logical. The emotions can trick you and when they subside, there is the impact of reality after the divorce. The studies I trust most indicate that children of intact marriages, even marriages with arguing spouses (not abuse or neglect), do better in school and also later in virtually every area of their adult lives. One expert says that individuals in a marriage change significantly every seven years or so, so much change that without concentrated effort by both spouses, you may not recognize each other any longer. Do you have the same definition of “happiness” that you did 5, 10, 20 or more years ago when you said your vows?
Do you feel that your only choice is to be married and miserable or get a divorce and be happy? How would you feel about paying child support and watching from a distance while another person parents your children with your former spouse? What do your children think now? Are they talking to a counselor or just to you? What do you predict will be children's opinion about this divorce when they are adults?... When they become parents? What was your relationship like with your parents? What about your spouse?
My selection of questions isn't comprehensive, and I certainly cannot provide you with answers. Our attorneys, however, have the experience and qualifications to guide you through the legal system with sensitivity to the things that worry you, and passion about the things that you deem important.
Call for your free consultation.